You asked me to “Be still”. I fought it with everything I had until I had no fight. You opened my heart, you let out the dark, the angry, the offences. You brought in the light.
Now, I’m facing a new fear - one for some unknown reason I couldn’t see coming.
Alone.
I think you know what this does to me. Once again this is something I don’t like! I know you understand that, and I know I’m not in control. You know all things before I even consider how I will react.
So how do I go forward? Do I go about my day driving forward what I feel needs to happen? (Because you’re just not getting it done.). Or do I just “be still”, engross myself in your word and let you lead me where I need to be?
Walk with you, talk with you, trust you. How much more can I spin my wheels until I realize you will take care of it when it’s time?
Trust you.
Trust you.
Trust you!
Love you!
Thank you!
Still, I don’t want to be here. If I react I will push myself into something that isn’t good, because I can’t wait. That will make your plan that much longer to bring around to fix all the problems I make or do I try to hold back, be patient, and learn the lessons you are putting in front of me everyday?
Teach me to consult you in every situation, then listen for your word or plainly do what I know in my heart you have been training me to do!?
Trust you.
Trust myself!
Know that you have made me who I am. You have made the situation before me. You have trained me.
I will do your will, because that is why you have put me here. Not to fail, but to step up, to lead, to learn more for the next situation you will walk me through.
Alone is something I will never be.
I will never truly know.
You are in my heart.
Your a part of me.
I will never be.
Alone.
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